When I was trying to decide on a name for my business and thinking about what Reiki has really brought into my life, the word that came back time and time again was “balance”.
We all seek it in one form or another, whether we are juggling work life balance, motherhood and time for ourselves, rest vs exercise… the list can go on and on. Balance is different for each and every one of us.
When I had my third child, not only was our family dynamic out of balance with 3 children vs two parents but I felt the axis of motherhood vs me as a person shift out of balance too. I was exhausted looking after 3 children aged 6 and under and trying to keep everything going. Although I didn’t realise it at the time, I was experiencing PND but trying to push through and carry on; as is my way.
I was constantly looking for balance, “time out”, a “solution” and knew that I had to find something to help me. I started running (despite the fact that I hated running at school) which gave me the chance to get out of the house for a bit and have a break. I also started seeing a counselor and at the same time went for my first Reiki session.
Reiki made such an impact on my life that it’s now my job. We are a “loud house” and operate on full volume the whole time. My counterbalance to that is Reiki. To practice Reiki, whether through self reiki or when treating a client, I have to bring myself into an intentional space of calm and quiet. This totally counter balances the “crazy” of my family life. Reiki is my anchor - every time - and with that comes finding my way back to balance.
Reiki teaches me to bring balance, wellbeing and better self care into my life every day. Don’t get me wrong, I don’t float around in a state of “Zen” the whole time but when things feel out of control or if stress, fear or worry creep in, then I have a tool to help bring me back to centre and find that small piece of calm and balance.
Why do you need Balance in your life?
Balance is an ever changing entity; it shifts gears quickly and usually, just when we have settled into a routine and got a bit “comfy,” something will come along and throw you off balance.
When you achieve balance, you realise that you have the potential to rise above your own circumstances. You can become more productive within your own setup and that of your community, which benefits everybody.
"Getting in balance is not so much about adopting new strategies to change your behaviors, as it is about realigning yourself in all of your thoughts so as to create a balance between what you desire and how you conduct your life on a daily basis."
Wayne Dyer. Being in Balance
If we can work at ways to find balance it can:
Reduce stress
Improve your mood
Help boost your energy
Improve your mental state of mind
Improve general health and well being
These are all attributes that Reiki can help with as well, which is why, when I talk about Reiki with people, so much of it is associated with balance.
How to tell if you are out of Balance
Being out of balance can manifest itself in many ways. It can arise through:
Negative emotions - anger, anxiety, procrastination, indecision and resentment
Physical symptoms - eg difficulty sleeping, headaches, poor concentration
Adopting unhealthy habits - too much sugar/caffeine/alcohol/smoking
Comparing yourself with others - feeling like they are getting it right and you are getting it so wrong.
Blaming everyone else and making excuses for what’s happening in your life.
What is Balance for you?
Everyone has their own idea about what is needed to bring balance into their own lives. If we take a minute to think about what we need in order to achieve balance it can range from making some really big changes and decisions to simply making small adjustments.
I try to find balance for the sake of my own health and happiness, my relationship, my time, my kids and my impact on others. If I think about all of these areas at once, it can seem like a really daunting task to make each one balance out, which would be unrealistic in any event.
“Balance is not something you find, it’s something you create”
Jana Kingford
Ask yourself:
What do I need right now?
What makes me happy?
What inspires me?
What is balance for me in the period of life that I am in now?
Take some time to really think about these questions, identify what you need and write it down. Then you can centre back to them and check in that what you are doing fits in with and aligns with your balance priorities.
I usually find that my focus has to be on one thing more than another in various ages and stages of our family life and so I have to adjust and align to what is needed for that moment and not worry if that is all I can focus on.
5 Ways to find Balance in your life
Here are a few suggestions to help you find balance. You may have other ideas or thoughts on how you can find balance which are meaningful for you. Either way, when things start to feel a bit “off” try and circle back to these tools so that you can address it before it becomes a bigger issue.
1. Make Time for Yourself
If you feel overlooked/tired/rundown because of family life, or because other areas of your life are taking over, then everyone around you will suffer as a result. Find something that gives you that chance to break for a while. I would recommend running ;) but it could be reading, taking a bath, gardening, listening to music, listening to a podcast, going to the gym or taking an exercise class - it doesn't really matter what it is as long as you can take that time out and build it into your day or if that’s not possible at least once a week.
2. Limit screen time
Check in with the way that you are using your screen time. Use it to connect and communicate. Follow accounts that inspire you and align to your goals and dreams so that you come away feeling motivated. Remember (and I have to really remind myself of this) that what you see is just a snapshot of others lives and not the reality that they live day in day out. Make sure that your time with tech does not leave you feeling inadequate or overwhelmed.
3. Environment
Try and find one area in your home that you can carve out as a space that brings you to a state of calm and balance; perhaps a corner of the sitting room where you can enjoy a cup of tea in peace, an area of the garden where you can sit in nature and balance out time spent indoors. Or maybe your balance is found at the gym or at an exercise class, or by carrying out a hobby or crafting.Try to make some time for that in your week.
4. Listen to yourself
Believe in your mind, body and heart. If they are telling you something isn’t right then listen to them. We will quite often dismiss a “feeling” that something is off or we will keep pushing ourselves to just keep going, telling ourselves “if I just get to that next stage then things will be better”. Listen to your body, if you feel overwhelmed and exhausted try to change one small thing to help that e.g. going to bed earlier or taking time in the day to sit and rest.
5. Do Something Different / Learn a new skill
Trying something new, a hobby, learning a new skill, trying a different exercise routine all of which can break up the monotony of everyday life and gives you something different to focus on every now and again. Balancing out what needs to be done with what brings you joy and a change of scenery.
Remember that you can find balance by just making small changes. Life doesn’t always run smoothly but by checking in with yourself on a regular basis and intentionally seeking out those things that align to your period of life in this moment, it will move you closer to your balance goals.
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